"The View from Here"
YD Industries Employee Weblog (aka - "blog")
By H. V. Smith

Blog pages: 1 2 3 4 5

Entry 10

Thank GOD for bagel dog Wednesdays at Order Up! You won't find a beter deal anywhere on a Wednesday than our very own vittle house. And believe me, I'm taking into account the Pizza Hut Pizza and Pudding bar. But make sure you get Jaime to do your tray! Rosa skimps on the chips.

Entry 11

Weekend Update

Well this will go down as one of my top five all time worst weekends EVER. In addition, I have discovered copious amounts of pilling on my formerly favorite sweater vest. (Needleburn calls it my Sweet-er Vest, as I once unknowingly walked around all day with a peppermint candy from the Indian Restaurant (Ali-Babb-Ahhs!)) Don't ask me how it got there!

Safe to say, that 10 hours + sitting in the scorching hot sun at TECHFest! on the campus of Trinity Jesuit College (Class of 92 - GO BENGALS!) hawking our newest YD 4000 Home Appliance Kit for Kids(r) did wonders for my morale. And of course as I was being cooked alive in my pilly sweater vest, which by then had started to stink of body sweat and artificial mint, who walks up to check in? Jane Singletary! I KNOW! My old nemesis from my days in the RatTrap. FYI, the RatTrap was what we jokingly called our cafetorium (half auditorium/half cafeteria). I held a coveted work study position scrubbing plates and Jane was my "manager". I won't go into details, but I will never be able to eat Polish sausage or lima beans again. It was really great to see her again. NOT. Let's just say that she reminds me a lot of Clarissa "It's Easier in Quark" Starkey in the Graphics Dept. THAT should tell you all you need to know.

In desperate need of a smoothie. I wish I worked in a cafetubicle (half-cafeteria/ half-cubicle!)

Entry 12

Gawd, sometimes it's the little things that get me.

Ergo I present the following exchange sent to me via email on 2/21 at 10:07:32 am re: my proposal to install a Bacon Station adjacent to OrderUp!

HV, I understand the need for haste, and I share Scott's enthusiasm. But there is a big "but" - the great vending machine kiosk fiasco of 2002/3, when otherwise inert inhabitants of Thornduke 4 rose up en masse because their physical environment was changed without their input. I would imagine that the Dukey Fours would support this one, but I do agree with Scott that the politik thing is to get them involved in the decision process.
:)> Gregg

I am so hating the people in Thornduke 4 right now. And what is that emoticon? Gregg with two gs has a goatee, I guess.

Entry 13

First of all...my apologies, I have finally been granted more bandwidth for this little project of mine - so I will be able to update with some new things I have been learning in my BBEdit class...can't wait!

Now for another Shit List:

1. New payroll procedures. If possible HR has managed to make our timesheets even more complicated. Now I have to deduct OT from COMP if I work less than 38 hours a week, but am exempt if I am here on alternate Saturdays? And I have to know which days I am going to be sick by the 18th of each month and then revise accordingly on the NEXT TS? Note to Alan Ramirez in HR: How about I just write a number on a post-it and you hand me a check?
2. Limited edition items in our snack machine. Can't there be some consistency? When I want a Reeses, I want the original, not White Chocolate Hazlenut Reeses. Now I have to wait for five more people to buy those, before the originals pop back to the fore in D7.
3. The distinctive aroma of the packaging in certain eBay purchases. My latest Taz collectibles came in newspaper that smelled like old lady. Taz no like!
4. The new hastily photcopied signage in the men's bathroom that reads "PLEASE FLUSH AFTER USING THE TOILET". Like I'm going to flush BEFORE using the toilet. Duh, what are we monkeys?
5. Bring your dog to work day. I'm pretty sure it's not "Bring your sick, sneezing, arthritic, hobbling, allergen-producing flea bag to work day".
6. Tom Needleburn's Elmo shirt. Not because I am ambivalent about that particular muppet, but because I kept thinking in my head "Tickle-Me-Elmo". And as much as I like Tom, I am not going to tickle that.
7. Ed, the parking lot cop. This guy is drunk with power. Two tickets in one week for going 15 in a 5 mph zone? Sorry, Ed, I don't drive a golf cart like you, with a top speed of 5mph. I drive a CAR, which doesn't even go 5 mph in reverse. And no, I don't know who broke your flashing yellow light. :)
8. Vitamin boost smoothies.
9. Those weird small flies that somehow manage to situate themselves in the mathematical center of any space and just zig zag around in a swarm. Has anyone looked into why or how they do that?
10. New ornery teenager working a summer gig at OrderUP! Don't think I didn't notice the eye roll when I asked for more bacon on my North of the Border Burger. It's gonna be a long summer, punk.

Well, that's all the shit that's fit to print. For now. I'm off to Sally's Submariner for a grinder with extra peppers.

Entry 14

Upside: New Staff Conference Room Tables.
Downside: Old staff.

LOL!

Off to the Noodle Poodle for some nosh!

Entry 15

Some people may look at this and think "Gee, HV, nice balloon collection." Others, of advanced intuition and superior intellect will see, as I do - the limitless potential of the human imagination.

In other words, I have begun taking classes in the fine art of inflatable sculptures. Look for more updates as I gain strength and ability! Requests will be taken! Which one should I use first....? Oh what the heck, I feel purple today!

I wonder if you can fill a balloon with pudding?

Entry 16

HA! I knew this would catch on! Check out Stan Herblonsky's stab at makin balloon critters for his cubby!

Nice work, Stan! (But I think you need to work on your tightening technique.)

PS - I never thought I would say those words...especially not to Stan "Tightwad" Herblonsky!

LOL - just joshin! See YOU at First Wednesday cake day in the break room! This month's featured flavor: Butterscotch Delight. Thanks again to Tom Needleburn for his expert cake selection. mmmmm...this is my favorite day of the month!

Blog pages: 1 2 3 4 5